My husband and I often have a chat about our ages and how we feel about the age we are. We often say that it doesn’t compute that I am 64 and he is 66. In many ways we don’t feel that old, but then – especially for me – my creaky body reminds me that yes, I am getting old. So, we don’t feel old at the moment, but my husband has said when he turned 60 it didn’t faze him at all, but when he reaches 70 years of age, that number feels old.
We have a neighbour who reached the milestone of 70 last year and still is very active and works doing lawns and other jobs for people and seems quite physically fit. I certainly wouldn’t look upon him as being old. I think it very much depends on the individual, their lifestyle, their fitness and also their attitude. If we just stop doing things because we reach a certain number then that may age us as we lose condition.
A few years ago now – perhaps 8 or so – I said to my husband that I thought it might be fun to get kayaks. We sort of looked into it, but then decided we probably wouldn’t use them enough to justify the purchase. Now, I think I could no more be in a kayak than fly to the moon. The reality is that I could not get down into a kayak and if I fell out, or even just trying to get back out of the kayak probably would be way beyond the realms of possibility. We also used to go on the luge in Queenstown and spend quite a bit of time there and loved it. However, that is another thing I know is no longer possible or at the very least not advisable.
My daughter was talking about going skiing with a new friend of hers the other day. She had gone when she was at school and said to me that she found it quite easy! I told her of my experience when I was older and tried to try my hand at skiing again. As she said, once I got the hang of it on the school trip it felt quite easy, but when I went as a middle-aged adult, I think my brain knew of the potential for damage to be done to my body and there was an element of fear in there. So, far from being a fun outing I was good at, I quickly learned that the time for skiing was past.
I also had the experience a couple of years ago when I was wheeling my trolley to my car in the carpark of the supermarket. A young guy came up to me and asked if he could put my bags in the car for me and if someone could help me when I got home? I suddenly realised he saw me as a white-haired old lady that needed help. Looking in the mirror, I think he wasn’t far wrong!
I was messaging my niece today about a possible trip to the UK via Dubai and as she had lived in the area, I asked for some recommendations for things to do in Dubai. She came back with a desert safari and said they were fun and you got to ride on camels!!! While I thanked her for the suggestion, I pointed out a number of flaws in the plan. Camels are high up and that on it’s own would freak me out. You sit in between their humps and the gait seems like you sort of rock from side to side and doesn’t look at all comfortable. Plus, I don’t trust them! I also don’t trust that their handler wouldn’t think it a hoot to see a white-haired old lady disappearing and shrieking into the distance on a rampaging camel. I think that’s once risk I am happy not to take.
So, activities these days need to be carefully considered and a risk analysis vs benefits is definitely part of the planning. I can walk on some tracks when we go away overseas I’m sure, but nothing too rugged. I’m sure we can find things at a suitable level that I can enjoy walking with my husband. It may just mean that he goes on the tougher ones on his own while I relax with a good book!
I know it is important to keep active and I will do that to the best of my ability. Going back to bowls will help as – despite some people’s perception of an ‘oldies sport’ – it is quite physical and a lot of walking involved. I will get back to longer walks with my husband too.
So, I have no real answers to when I would think myself old. I think if you completely stop doing active things and eliminate all risks and become mega risk averse then physically you would become old.
I am happy to let go of the idea of kayaking.
I have no need or wish to ride a camel.
My luge-ing days are over and that’s OK.
But perhaps for my 70th I can revisit the activity that I did for my 50th Birthday?
I quite fancy jumping out of a plane again on a tandem skydive!!!
Here’s a link to my podcast if you’d like a listen
https://open.spotify.com/episode/6hrLGRrtBMA10zUkYN8KP1?si=yVdGMSxsQD-o_QDNnIjZAA
My journey with Parkinsons 